Bring me my machine gun

If you think the heckling of Patricia De Lille at a Human Rights Day rally in Cape Town is preposterous, outrageous and uncalled for, think again. It's par for the course as we enter election time once again. This means we're all expected to lose our minds (those of us who hadn't already lost them)."This kind of behaviour doesn't promote tolerance of any other persons idea," half-heartedly droned an ANC MP in the national assembly in reaction to the incident. We know, buddy, politics is all about hugging trees, making nice with everyone and clapping hands cheerfully as if we were all at a scripture union camp. What the brain says, the hand doesn't necessarily do. So, if Luthuli House, that great national think tank of the ruling party, says make love not war, then of course it would be safe to say, this could be interpreted as, beat the crap out of anyone not wearing yellow, green and black. And that's what the ANC seems to relish in doing when confronted with elections. Except, it's beating itself up, instead. The rise of independent candidates from within it's own ranks is all the evidence you need that the party's arrogance is it's own worst enemy. Forget opposition parties. This time round, COSATU boss, Zwelinzima Vavi, even remarked "They are showing the ANC the middle finger". Careful. That kind of behaviour towards the ANC is could land you up in the back seat of a luxury, black SUV, commandeered by black suited goons, with silly little wires connected to their ears. A political ouma like Patty De Lille, knows the drill when confronted by heckling - just ignore it, because it gets worse. It's one of the few times where adults (supposed adults, at that,because going into politics is about as childish as eating snot) will abandon their adulthood. being able to tie your own shoelaces and count to 10 means nothing in the world of politics. Wait for it. When the rallies, community meetings, door-to-door campaign go into warp speed those political loafers and morons who drain our coffers, waffle all day but rarely make sense, those characters who are meant to run our country, will exchange their Gucci suits and Jimmy Choos for party t-shirts as they try to convince us we should waste... I mean, cast our votes for them. They'll dance and sing as they promise and deride each other. They'll fling mud in all directions except of course at themselves. They'll scorn, deplore, praise and tease each other. hey, it's every parties unspoken election manifesto - skulduggery, pettiness and stupidity. All eyes on Julius over this period, that King of bluster has already demonstrated his wily ability at being an idiot. Helen Zille was a cockroach last time round. Now she's a monkey. Shame, she'd din't get the memo - whitey's should never, ever dance. I have no idea how COPE will try to campaign. Lekota on a donkey cart with a loudhailer, might be above the party's budget. If donkey carts and megaphones are being dished out to his comrade, Shilowa may have to settle for a bicycle, one placard and a whistle simply to draw what little attention there is for COPE to him. Good luck pal. Come what may for COPE, one things for sure, they won't need to canvass against opposition parties. They seem quite happy at contesting their own make-believe elections among themselves.